SL is such a great arena to get cyber-sexed in, and it's tempting to reap the benefits. Only please be honest about your motives! Squashy's aren't always the best but i guarantee they're open and they're out there. We don't conceal what we’re looking for; we don't disguise what we’re hoping to get. Likewise, we expect you to tell us what you're expecting from US. At the outset is preferable. Oh, it can hang in the air for a while, just until the mist clears, but don't deliberately obfuscate the issue. And don't paint a patina of altruism or even friendship where none exists. If all you're looking for is a quick "bunk up", then SAY SO. At least have the decency to give us the choice of whether or not we want that!
We've all heard about the partnered avie who uses an alt to slip around unobserved in order to have adulterous sex (Is it adultery if you're SL partnered? I assume it is). That's clearly dishonest. But there are other, more subtle forms of concealment. A bit like spraying a maggotty old windfall with laquer and calling it edible. It's still rotten on the inside!
It's funny, isn't it, how you can look at someone's av, observe them day after day and have completely the wrong idea about them. Eg, oh, there's that bloke again. The one who never has anyone to dance with. Must be a non-English speaker. Wrong and wrong.
Let's call this chap Slinky. It's close enough to his real SL name and appropriate to my purpose.
Now picture Squashy at the naturist resort, all cute and nakie and alone, whilst i busy myself moving stuff around in her shambles of an inventory. We are both thus occupied when there's an incoming message:
"Lovely avie... great profile etc, etc."
Nothing unusual about that. Some desultory conversation ensues, concluding, typically, with a complaint about the lag. This leads, as comments about lag invariably do, to Slinky asking us to "go somewhere" with him. Well we know a line when we hear one, and that old chestnut about "lag" is as old as the Grid itself. That said, we've nothing else to do and he has a private island, he says, with dance balls.
We arrive at his island which is an entire sim, possibly more. His home contains several sex beds and is large enough to house a small commune. There's a pool and a dance area and pink and blue poseballs littered about the entire island. I am impressed.
Conversation isn't great (he's not gifted in that department) so i take the opportunity to check out his groups. I notice something called "Slinky's Angels" and a warning bell tinkles in back of my brain.
"What's that group? What's it for? And who are all those women?!"
Slinky duly informs us that the group comprises 37 women from 14 different countries. They all live with him in a merry little arrangement that apparently suits all. It's a ménage á thirty-eight! Oh, well. Whatever floats the collective boat, i suppose. *Shrug*. But then it gets surreal. The island, he claims, is a SANCTUARY for these poor, beleaguered women. Slinky goes on to say that no men are allowed on the island, not even to set foot on it.
"What, no men at all?" squeaks squashy. Well, none except Slinky. It's *his* island, after all. It bears his name and everything.
"Ewwwwww", comments squashy, with that tell-tale wrinkle of the nose. I clamp my hand over her mouth and hiss at her to STFU.
But here's the thing: ALL his women are bi-sexual!
Well, that rules YOU out, i say to Squashy, giving her a quick poke. "Not necessarily", she retorts, flashing her pert little buns before running off to ensnare a new toy.
And i'm left contemplating, just how slinky is Slinky?! He's really thought this one out, hasn't he? How else to ensure an endless source of girl-on-girl action whilst getting a little something for yourself at the same time? According to Slinky, ALL 37 women have sex with him of their own volition and ALL are "hot in the sack".
I posit that some are, in fact, men. According to Slinky, this cannot be, because ALL are voice verified. What? Even the 2 week old newbs? He has a fair number of those. I wonder where he picks them up! Does he hang around in noob areas offering "sanctuary"? How revolting.
Slinky then asks which viewer i'm using and i tell him, "2.00". He points out helpfully, that, had i been using Emerald i could've cam'd to the other side of the island and observed "3 women getting it on". I unhinge a jaw-cracking yawn, make my excuses and leave.
So there you have it: How to acquire your own, personal harem. Simply purchase an island, fill it with pose-balls, call it a sanctuary for bi-sexual women and ban the entire male population from ever setting foot on it. It's your own place, you've paid for it, you can do what the heck you like with it. And if you want to be supa-generous and give the homeless, bi-sexual women of SL a place to live, it's entirely up to you, isn't it?
I don't know any of the women in his group, but i REALLY hope they're laughing their asses off at his expense. And who can say how often he actually gets "teh sex"? I only have *his* word for that and i already call BS on his worthy little enterprise.
"Sanctuary" my pixellated arse.
* ~ *
Friday, 20 August 2010
Friday, 2 July 2010
So THAT'S what she gets up to after I log off
She wakes up ... opens one frozen eye ... then staggers to her feet ...
Sustained by the blood of her most recent victim, she lurches off into the night ...
Now showing at a cinema near you. But only if you're VERY unlucky.
Sustained by the blood of her most recent victim, she lurches off into the night ...
Demon Nurse Dolly is thirsty!
Now showing at a cinema near you. But only if you're VERY unlucky.
Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Have skirt, Will travel
There's more to Thom than meets the eye, but i'm not telling. ;-)
Well, the rather pleasing sight of Thom Yorkiv in a skirt put me in mind of a recent discovery. Want to know more? Of course you do!
So there i was, shopping for hair in one of the larger stores, and trying to get my bearings whilst struggling against stultifying lag. As i hovered gently in the air, i spotted an unlikely couple. She was the high priestess ofwank something-or-other. The big, hairy oik in a loincloth glued to her side was, it transpired, one of her "love slaves". I perused their profiles and marvelled at their exotic lifestyle. It was all sex, shackles and shagging - from first profile pick to last. I was appalled and deeply envious. That is to say squashy was the envious one; I could only look on in mute disapproval.
And then i chanced to notice the state of their skins. Quelle horreur! "Old style" would be putting it mildly.
How can one possibly have sex and slaves, and i don't know what-all else, and still be wearing the same, tired skin one originally pitched up in, back in 2006?
I continue to live and learn. It would appear that realistic skins aren't a prerequisite for the 'lifestyle', particularly not for him, that great lug! [Personally, Squashy and i like our men to look as realistic as is avatarily possible, although what we like and what we end with up are two different things. This is largely Squashy's fault, of course].
Well, Squashy being how she is, she couldn't help but cam up inside his loincloth – actually more of a skirt, with slits – and her eyes all but fell out their sockets. The lack of realism ended some way below the attachment.
"So that's what he spent all his lindens on, that big eedjut!"
At this point, i'd cheerfully have dragged her away by the hair, but since the new locks had failed to rez and she was as bald as an egg i decided to let it go.
Later that day, i almost fell over a female slave crouched on the floor in a submissive and revealing pose. Yes, it was a public place, and yes, she was missing one intimate item of apparel. Call me old-fashioned, but i nearly told her to put on some knickers. Going commando is clearly an intrinsic part of what it means to be "in service". *grin*
Squashy, meantime, was all for going off and finding yet more men in skirts/loin-clothes to spy upon; that is, until i removed the camera forcibly from her sticky grasp and told her to go and do something more useful instead, like resize her head. The trollop.
***
Well, the rather pleasing sight of Thom Yorkiv in a skirt put me in mind of a recent discovery. Want to know more? Of course you do!
So there i was, shopping for hair in one of the larger stores, and trying to get my bearings whilst struggling against stultifying lag. As i hovered gently in the air, i spotted an unlikely couple. She was the high priestess of
And then i chanced to notice the state of their skins. Quelle horreur! "Old style" would be putting it mildly.
How can one possibly have sex and slaves, and i don't know what-all else, and still be wearing the same, tired skin one originally pitched up in, back in 2006?
I continue to live and learn. It would appear that realistic skins aren't a prerequisite for the 'lifestyle', particularly not for him, that great lug! [Personally, Squashy and i like our men to look as realistic as is avatarily possible, although what we like and what we end with up are two different things. This is largely Squashy's fault, of course].
Well, Squashy being how she is, she couldn't help but cam up inside his loincloth – actually more of a skirt, with slits – and her eyes all but fell out their sockets. The lack of realism ended some way below the attachment.
"So that's what he spent all his lindens on, that big eedjut!"
At this point, i'd cheerfully have dragged her away by the hair, but since the new locks had failed to rez and she was as bald as an egg i decided to let it go.
Later that day, i almost fell over a female slave crouched on the floor in a submissive and revealing pose. Yes, it was a public place, and yes, she was missing one intimate item of apparel. Call me old-fashioned, but i nearly told her to put on some knickers. Going commando is clearly an intrinsic part of what it means to be "in service". *grin*
Squashy, meantime, was all for going off and finding yet more men in skirts/loin-clothes to spy upon; that is, until i removed the camera forcibly from her sticky grasp and told her to go and do something more useful instead, like resize her head. The trollop.
***
Thursday, 25 February 2010
Thoughts on SL Partnering - Part One
Plenty of people get married in SL. Plenty of others don't. For some it's the summation of their SL existence; the pinnacle of the dream. The rest of us can only shake our heads in wonderment. Or is there a little bit of envy there, too? Having observed - and listened - to Squashy at length, it would appear that the girl has opinions.
So, in a spirit of enquiry, let's examine 2 real scenarios at opposite ends of the SL 'partnering' spectrum. Names have been changed to protect the guilty!
(1) Ben is a chap who falls in love easily. That said, and to use his own words, he takes commitment seriously. Cynical as i am (and hence this post), I know that Ben is sincere.
Ben was lonely in SL. And for him there could be only one solution: to find the 'right woman' and marry her. In short order, he met a lady, fell in love and was engaged to be married. It very nearly worked out - until she shaved her head and announced that she was joining a buddhist monastery. Undaunted, Ben quickly fell in love with the ex-fiancé's best friend and, as luck would have it, she returned his feelings. Within a month they were "SL partnered" and are , as far as i know, still living in matrimonial harmony.
Squashy, I think, has a few sour grapes. She doesn't want the commitment but feels it'd be nice to be asked -- by someone at some point. I don't think it matters who! She mutters darkly about the fact that had Ben not married that particular woman then he'd have married someone else - anyone else - "sooner rather than later". According to Squashy, this is because Ben is the "marrying kind". Typically, she covers her back by suggesting that the wife is clearly a remarkable human-being with qualities more sterling than a British fifty pound note.
She's a funny girl, but I understand her point. Had Squashy met him first, he might have wanted to marry her, too. It would've been somewhat flattering, and I know how much she enjoys being flattered. Not that she'd have accepted him, of course; she's not into all that. All she really wants to do is slut around.
The point she's making is this: Are there not many, many potential soul-mates for a man like Ben? And if that's true then it makes the nauseating profile gushing (so endemic amongst SL partnered couples) a pathetic and pointless exercise. Squashy states that if she inadvertently reads any more such drivel she will barf all over our shared keyboard.
On a lighter note, it amuses both of us to imagine Ben getting down on bended knee and declaring his undying love to whomever (blue poseball, anyone?)
Don't get me wrong. Ben is a nice chap. In fact, there's nothing wrong with Ben that a bit of light-hearted playing the field wouldn't fix. Especially when said field is pixellated, and crawling with attractive avs - albeit some of them display unfashionable qualities such as wit, intelligence, personality, etc. *cough*
(2) Salter, on the other hand, is an entirely different kettle of fish (those fish, by the way, have been percolating for days and they stink).
In RL, Salter is unattractive and bitter. He's not getting any younger, and he's not getting much of anything else, either. In SL, Salter has an iron-hard body, a gigantic penis and his own hair. The effect is strikingly virile and only marginally silly. Clearly, he knows what he wants and how to go about getting it.
Salter is a serial womaniser with sociopathic traits. He rides roughshod over anyone stupid enough to fall for his lines and assumes it doesn't matter because, "it's not real, is it?" Indeed, there's no level of manipulation to which he won't stoop so long as it brings about his goal of sexual satisfaction. The places he haunts, his chosen employment (erotic dancer), the skin and shape he wears are all geared towards that end. Even his AO (animation over-rider) is chosen for effect: "I'm sooooo bad but, oh shucks, I can't help it! I'm just a loveable schmuck!".
Typically, Salter will invite you into his SL and wheedle you into 'position'. At some point, he[ll start bringing in other players. You'll know that you're being played but he'll make it seem as though you can win. (Unbeknownst to you he's doing the exact same thing with the other combatants). He'll play you off, shove you around and manipulate you into doing things his way, just to get you 'further up the board'. At which point you'll discover you were never the 'queen' you thought you were, and – checkmate! Far better to be eliminated as a pawn before you ever get that far, except you're not in a position to know that. In short, he treats SL as a game and you’d better believe he's playing to win.
When asked her opinion on the matter, Squashy flounced off, muttering something along the lines of "tiny RL dick" and, "what goes around comes around". Don't worry, I'll be having words with her later. ;-)
The irony is that with all his malignant jiggery-pokery, Salter still has a fairly rational idea of what SL is – or can be – about. He's doing what he can't get away with in Real Life. He's using his (albeit limited) imagination and he's living out his dream.
Ben, on the other hand, is running his Second Life on similar lines to his RL. I don't know for sure, but I suspect he's the marrying kind there, as well. He's not doing anything radically different. And this begs the question, is there any point? Given that you can be whomever and whatever you choose, why would you decide to make your SL the same as your RL?
I suppose the only conclusion to be drawn from all this is that everyone operates their Second Life differently. And it might or might not reflect their Real Life. Some get married; some don't. Others (like Squashy) get pissed off because the married ones have effectually removed themselves from the 'game'. And is it purely a game, or is it a whole lot more? It seems the more questions one tries to answer concerning this odd, contradictory world, the more pop up.
One thing's for certain. Squashy won't be committing herself to one person any time soon. And, if, by some remote chance, she ever does do the matrimonial thing, I promise you this: She'll be the most shameless bigamist you ever heard of. Watch this space.
End.
So, in a spirit of enquiry, let's examine 2 real scenarios at opposite ends of the SL 'partnering' spectrum. Names have been changed to protect the guilty!
(1) Ben is a chap who falls in love easily. That said, and to use his own words, he takes commitment seriously. Cynical as i am (and hence this post), I know that Ben is sincere.
Ben was lonely in SL. And for him there could be only one solution: to find the 'right woman' and marry her. In short order, he met a lady, fell in love and was engaged to be married. It very nearly worked out - until she shaved her head and announced that she was joining a buddhist monastery. Undaunted, Ben quickly fell in love with the ex-fiancé's best friend and, as luck would have it, she returned his feelings. Within a month they were "SL partnered" and are , as far as i know, still living in matrimonial harmony.
Squashy, I think, has a few sour grapes. She doesn't want the commitment but feels it'd be nice to be asked -- by someone at some point. I don't think it matters who! She mutters darkly about the fact that had Ben not married that particular woman then he'd have married someone else - anyone else - "sooner rather than later". According to Squashy, this is because Ben is the "marrying kind". Typically, she covers her back by suggesting that the wife is clearly a remarkable human-being with qualities more sterling than a British fifty pound note.
She's a funny girl, but I understand her point. Had Squashy met him first, he might have wanted to marry her, too. It would've been somewhat flattering, and I know how much she enjoys being flattered. Not that she'd have accepted him, of course; she's not into all that. All she really wants to do is slut around.
The point she's making is this: Are there not many, many potential soul-mates for a man like Ben? And if that's true then it makes the nauseating profile gushing (so endemic amongst SL partnered couples) a pathetic and pointless exercise. Squashy states that if she inadvertently reads any more such drivel she will barf all over our shared keyboard.
On a lighter note, it amuses both of us to imagine Ben getting down on bended knee and declaring his undying love to whomever (blue poseball, anyone?)
Don't get me wrong. Ben is a nice chap. In fact, there's nothing wrong with Ben that a bit of light-hearted playing the field wouldn't fix. Especially when said field is pixellated, and crawling with attractive avs - albeit some of them display unfashionable qualities such as wit, intelligence, personality, etc. *cough*
(2) Salter, on the other hand, is an entirely different kettle of fish (those fish, by the way, have been percolating for days and they stink).
In RL, Salter is unattractive and bitter. He's not getting any younger, and he's not getting much of anything else, either. In SL, Salter has an iron-hard body, a gigantic penis and his own hair. The effect is strikingly virile and only marginally silly. Clearly, he knows what he wants and how to go about getting it.
Salter is a serial womaniser with sociopathic traits. He rides roughshod over anyone stupid enough to fall for his lines and assumes it doesn't matter because, "it's not real, is it?" Indeed, there's no level of manipulation to which he won't stoop so long as it brings about his goal of sexual satisfaction. The places he haunts, his chosen employment (erotic dancer), the skin and shape he wears are all geared towards that end. Even his AO (animation over-rider) is chosen for effect: "I'm sooooo bad but, oh shucks, I can't help it! I'm just a loveable schmuck!".
Typically, Salter will invite you into his SL and wheedle you into 'position'. At some point, he[ll start bringing in other players. You'll know that you're being played but he'll make it seem as though you can win. (Unbeknownst to you he's doing the exact same thing with the other combatants). He'll play you off, shove you around and manipulate you into doing things his way, just to get you 'further up the board'. At which point you'll discover you were never the 'queen' you thought you were, and – checkmate! Far better to be eliminated as a pawn before you ever get that far, except you're not in a position to know that. In short, he treats SL as a game and you’d better believe he's playing to win.
When asked her opinion on the matter, Squashy flounced off, muttering something along the lines of "tiny RL dick" and, "what goes around comes around". Don't worry, I'll be having words with her later. ;-)
The irony is that with all his malignant jiggery-pokery, Salter still has a fairly rational idea of what SL is – or can be – about. He's doing what he can't get away with in Real Life. He's using his (albeit limited) imagination and he's living out his dream.
Ben, on the other hand, is running his Second Life on similar lines to his RL. I don't know for sure, but I suspect he's the marrying kind there, as well. He's not doing anything radically different. And this begs the question, is there any point? Given that you can be whomever and whatever you choose, why would you decide to make your SL the same as your RL?
I suppose the only conclusion to be drawn from all this is that everyone operates their Second Life differently. And it might or might not reflect their Real Life. Some get married; some don't. Others (like Squashy) get pissed off because the married ones have effectually removed themselves from the 'game'. And is it purely a game, or is it a whole lot more? It seems the more questions one tries to answer concerning this odd, contradictory world, the more pop up.
One thing's for certain. Squashy won't be committing herself to one person any time soon. And, if, by some remote chance, she ever does do the matrimonial thing, I promise you this: She'll be the most shameless bigamist you ever heard of. Watch this space.
End.
Under the Melon Tree
A whole weekend and no date!
Nothing to do but mope ...
And all because I had a pimple on my nose!
You know you want me. *wink*
Nothing to do but mope ...
And all because I had a pimple on my nose!
You know you want me. *wink*
Saturday, 20 February 2010
A One Time Thing
They met through mutual friends.
He was the sulky god of Emo;
She was a trash princess from the wrong side of the tracks.
They stayed behind, long after the others had left
And watched the grey skies turn
To lurid night.
Neither spoke --
They had no need for words.
He took out his panpipes
And played and danced,
Almost, it seemed
As if his Life
Depended on it.
Perhaps it did.
The trash princess smiled kindly on the god of Emo.
And when the sun finally rose,
She gifted him
With a kiss.
~ End ~
He was the sulky god of Emo;
She was a trash princess from the wrong side of the tracks.
They stayed behind, long after the others had left
And watched the grey skies turn
To lurid night.
Neither spoke --
They had no need for words.
He took out his panpipes
And played and danced,
Almost, it seemed
As if his Life
Depended on it.
Perhaps it did.
The trash princess smiled kindly on the god of Emo.
And when the sun finally rose,
She gifted him
With a kiss.
~ End ~
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)