Thursday 25 February 2010

Thoughts on SL Partnering - Part One

Plenty of people get married in SL. Plenty of others don't. For some it's the summation of their SL existence; the pinnacle of the dream. The rest of us can only shake our heads in wonderment. Or is there a little bit of envy there, too? Having observed - and listened - to Squashy at length, it would appear that the girl has opinions.

So, in a spirit of enquiry, let's examine 2 real scenarios at opposite ends of the SL 'partnering' spectrum. Names have been changed to protect the guilty!

(1) Ben is a chap who falls in love easily. That said, and to use his own words, he takes commitment seriously. Cynical as i am (and hence this post), I know that Ben is sincere.

Ben was lonely in SL. And for him there could be only one solution: to find the 'right woman' and marry her. In short order, he met a lady, fell in love and was engaged to be married. It very nearly worked out - until she shaved her head and announced that she was joining a buddhist monastery. Undaunted, Ben quickly fell in love with the ex-fiancé's best friend and, as luck would have it, she returned his feelings. Within a month they were "SL partnered" and are , as far as i know, still living in matrimonial harmony.

Squashy, I think, has a few sour grapes. She doesn't want the commitment but feels it'd be nice to be asked -- by someone at some point. I don't think it matters who! She mutters darkly about the fact that had Ben not married that particular woman then he'd have married someone else - anyone else - "sooner rather than later". According to Squashy, this is because Ben is the "marrying kind". Typically, she covers her back by suggesting that the wife is clearly a remarkable human-being with qualities more sterling than a British fifty pound note.

She's a funny girl, but I understand her point. Had Squashy met him first, he might have wanted to marry her, too. It would've been somewhat flattering, and I know how much she enjoys being flattered. Not that she'd have accepted him, of course; she's not into all that. All she really wants to do is slut around.

The point she's making is this: Are there not many, many potential soul-mates for a man like Ben? And if that's true then it makes the nauseating profile gushing (so endemic amongst SL partnered couples) a pathetic and pointless exercise. Squashy states that if she inadvertently reads any more such drivel she will barf all over our shared keyboard.

On a lighter note, it amuses both of us to imagine Ben getting down on bended knee and declaring his undying love to whomever (blue poseball, anyone?)

Don't get me wrong. Ben is a nice chap. In fact, there's nothing wrong with Ben that a bit of light-hearted playing the field wouldn't fix. Especially when said field is pixellated, and crawling with attractive avs - albeit some of them display unfashionable qualities such as wit, intelligence, personality, etc. *cough*

(2) Salter, on the other hand, is an entirely different kettle of fish (those fish, by the way, have been percolating for days and they stink).

In RL, Salter is unattractive and bitter. He's not getting any younger, and he's not getting much of anything else, either. In SL, Salter has an iron-hard body, a gigantic penis and his own hair. The effect is strikingly virile and only marginally silly. Clearly, he knows what he wants and how to go about getting it.

Salter is a serial womaniser with sociopathic traits. He rides roughshod over anyone stupid enough to fall for his lines and assumes it doesn't matter because, "it's not real, is it?" Indeed, there's no level of manipulation to which he won't stoop so long as it brings about his goal of sexual satisfaction. The places he haunts, his chosen employment (erotic dancer), the skin and shape he wears are all geared towards that end. Even his AO (animation over-rider) is chosen for effect: "I'm sooooo bad but, oh shucks, I can't help it! I'm just a loveable schmuck!".

Typically, Salter will invite you into his SL and wheedle you into 'position'. At some point, he[ll start bringing in other players. You'll know that you're being played but he'll make it seem as though you can win. (Unbeknownst to you he's doing the exact same thing with the other combatants). He'll play you off, shove you around and manipulate you into doing things his way, just to get you 'further up the board'. At which point you'll discover you were never the 'queen' you thought you were, and – checkmate! Far better to be eliminated as a pawn before you ever get that far, except you're not in a position to know that. In short, he treats SL as a game and you’d better believe he's playing to win.

When asked her opinion on the matter, Squashy flounced off, muttering something along the lines of "tiny RL dick" and, "what goes around comes around". Don't worry, I'll be having words with her later. ;-)

The irony is that with all his malignant jiggery-pokery, Salter still has a fairly rational idea of what SL is – or can be – about. He's doing what he can't get away with in Real Life. He's using his (albeit limited) imagination and he's living out his dream.

Ben, on the other hand, is running his Second Life on similar lines to his RL. I don't know for sure, but I suspect he's the marrying kind there, as well. He's not doing anything radically different. And this begs the question, is there any point? Given that you can be whomever and whatever you choose, why would you decide to make your SL the same as your RL?

I suppose the only conclusion to be drawn from all this is that everyone operates their Second Life differently. And it might or might not reflect their Real Life. Some get married; some don't. Others (like Squashy) get pissed off because the married ones have effectually removed themselves from the 'game'. And is it purely a game, or is it a whole lot more? It seems the more questions one tries to answer concerning this odd, contradictory world, the more pop up.

One thing's for certain. Squashy won't be committing herself to one person any time soon. And, if, by some remote chance, she ever does do the matrimonial thing, I promise you this: She'll be the most shameless bigamist you ever heard of. Watch this space.

End.

Under the Melon Tree

A whole weekend and no date!




Nothing to do but mope ...




And all because I had a pimple on my nose!




You know you want me. *wink*

Saturday 20 February 2010

A One Time Thing

They met through mutual friends.




He was the sulky god of Emo;




She was a trash princess from the wrong side of the tracks.




They stayed behind, long after the others had left




And watched the grey skies turn




To lurid night.




Neither spoke --




They had no need for words.




He took out his panpipes




And played and danced,




Almost, it seemed




As if his Life




Depended on it.




Perhaps it did.




The trash princess smiled kindly on the god of Emo.




And when the sun finally rose,




She gifted him




With a kiss.




~ End ~